Chores? What Are Chores?
We’ve all heard it before, “When I was a kid, we got up three hours before we had to be at school to complete our chores. And then, we had to walk to school. Up hill … BOTH WAYS!”
As a child, I remember rolling my eyes when hearing such statements … but now, I’m thinking, “WHAT THE HECK!! The kids today don’t know how easy they have it.” And quite frankly, I believe we’ve only got ourselves to blame, as parents.
When did the standard change? When did it become acceptable for it to be more important to be a ‘friend’ to our children, rather than a ‘parent’? How did it become the norm that children aren’t held responsible for doing anything? Or being responsible for anything they do? And how in the world do children not get their mouths washed out with soap for saying some of the things they say … TO THEIR PARENTS??
All of this has become the norm. And what do the kids get in return? New video games! Fast food! Cell Phones!
A few years back, and I’m not saying how many, I was responsible for doing chores. It was my part in the family. The few things I was able to do to help out, allowing things run smoothly in our home. When I was 10 or 11 years old (pretty close to how old my two boys are), emptying the dishwasher … mowing the lawn … cleaning my room … folding laundry … those were things I just did.
Without question.
And if I did question … well, I don’t know what would happen … because I NEVER DID!!!
Today, I feel, children believe they are “entitled” to everything. Without earning a darned thing they are given. And the parents not earning the respect they should have from their kids.
It was just the other day, I realized my rugrats are no better. They don’t do crap around here. And while they don’t have cell phones … they do have their share of video games and fast food. I’m just sayin’. Guilty.
It’s amazing when these ‘light bulb’ moments go off in a mother’s head. A certain rage takes place when you realize you’ve been cheated.
Or cheating. Cheating your kids that is … because these same children that are not made to hold any sort of responsibility … will be lost when they grow up and have to move on and out on their own. They will not know how to function. They will have no clue how to care for themselves. Another light bulb moment … maybe that is why it is not uncommon for grown children these days … to live at home into their twenties, sometimes thirties. When you look at it like that … it all makes sense, doesn’t it? Good grief.
So, I frantically do what I know … and that is to pull up GOOGLE. What else would I do? Hello?
And I find something perfect. Exactly what our family needs.
CHECK THIS OUT …
Does anyone else feel their family and children are slipping away from what they had envision for them … just because ‘that’s just the way it is’ in today’s world? Are you caught up in the hype or have you been able to stay strong and raise your kiddos ‘old school’?
Since my kids log online each day, I plan to use this new way of keeping track of their chores … and rewards. I’ve shared it with my kids and they have expressed interest and excitement by using online chore manager. I’ll let you know how it goes …
Your thoughts? Where are you and your family when it comes to chores and responsibility?
My two kiddos are 2 1/2 and 5 and have been doing chores around the house since they were about 18 months. I’m a slave driver!
Seriously, though, the older one puts away the silverware when the dishwasher is clean, feeds the dog in the morning, vacuums her bedroom when we’re doing a big cleaning and will even mop her own room (I have a child-sized mop and all I have to do is help ring out the water because a lake on a hardwood floor isn’t a good thing). Our 2 1/2 year old sets the kids’ portion of the table (they use plastic plates and we use glass, so we’re more comfortable letting him set his) and he feeds the dog in the evening. Both kids are in charge of putting away their own clothes when I do laundry (the younger one only does the bottom two drawers because he can’t reach any higher), they clear their plates every day after eating each meal, and they pick up all of their toys upstairs (main floor and bedrooms) at the end of each day so that the house is ready to start clean-ish at the beginning of each day. We do not give them allowances yet and they do these jobs because they are members of the family, not because they get rewards. I guess I’m old-school!
I am with Shelley on this one. Our kids help out as well, at least the oldest two (3yrs 20m). From picking up toys to help setting and clearing plates at the table. We have chores by age and it is fun to see the younger take over for the older as they grow. Our son now helps clear the table and has passed on the chore of getting the dust buster to his sister. She loves it. In another year, she will pass that on to our youngest. Kids need to be production and have a role in the family activities. It helps them as much as it does us, the parents.
My girls do chores, too (ages 3 1/2 and 5 1/2). Some are on their commission chart (feed/water the dog, make beds), others they do because, as part of the family, they must- pick up their toys (because if mommy or daddy pick them up they get put up for 2 weeks; if we have to pick them up too many times they go in the garage sale pile), take dinner dishes to the sink, daily stuff.
My girls do earn a commission (rather than an allowance- it’s a Dave Ramsey thing) of $3.50 per week. 50 cents goes to God, $1.50 goes to savings and $1.50 goes to spending. They also have money deducted for not doing their chores or for bad attitudes and whining. My hope is it teaches them that
a) you work for the money you have
b) you give from what you make\
c) saving money is smart
Chores are something that are common place in my house. I did chores as a kid, and my kids will as long as they live in my house. Being a part of the house means helping take care of things, whether it is unloading the dishwasher or picking up dog poop. During the summer espeically the kids have specific chores that MUST be done before anything else, and that keeps us all a bit saner.
Hunter: Load dishwasher, sweep living room and kitchen, clean bathroom.
Boo: unload dishwasher, take out trash, help clean bathroom
Both each day: Pick up dog poop, put away laundry, keep rooms “clean”
I also am a HUGE fan of NOT paying allowance with chores. You live in this house, consider your chores rent! lol We do an allowance, but it has nothing to do with chores and everything to do with behavior. I will pay if they voluntarily do extra stuff though.
I used to have a chore chart for Caity (5), but at some point she lost interest and it stopped motivating her to keep up with it. I think I might reinstitute it and copy Jody’s idea, I think it would be a good thing.
Ethan (3) doesn’t have chores… think I am going to start instituting this also. however, he does clean up when I ask him to and cleans when interested like dusting or vaccuming.. I have pictures to proves as well.
We’ve done chore charts and they didn’t work for more than a week, I stink at keeping up with those. They went for money at some point, like each chore was worth so much money, but then that didn’t entice them, so we stopped with the money.
My kids are now 10 & 12 and I think they are the only kids on the block that have chores to do! The neighborhood kids are outside 24/7 it seems so not sure when they do housework unless it’s first thing in the morning. Some of the main chores my kids do are…my kids have to bring their dirty laundry to the laundry room, then I fill the washer (or they STUFF it) and then do washer to dryer and then dryer to basket and upstairs where they dump it and it sits on their bedroom floor for about a week until they’ve worn it all again, lol. No, I eventually get on them to put it in the closet and drawers! My boys also unload the dishwasher. They collect the recycling and take the bucket to the road on garage day and bring the 2 cans back up to the porch. They set the table when asked and puts away the dirty dishes. They’ll vacuum sometimes. They pick up the sticks in the yard before DH mows it. They also pick up their play room (very rarely, I usually just shut the door) and they clean the living room of their toys.
I don’t think it’s a ton, but they are aware they have to help the family out, mom doesn’t do it all even if I am home all day. They’ll fight me about doing them somedays, but they know they’re not going to win and give in and help. Sometimes my younger one will ask for more chores